random thoughts:
I think my body rejects all kinds of western medication. Sleeping pills keep me awake now. Diet pills make me hungry. energy drinks knock me out. I procrastinate too much. Once again, guys with girlfriends apparently are attracted to me. I haven't slept yet. It is 4:30 in the morning. I haven't even touched my homework either. I don't know what is wrong with me. I am not taking any summer classes. I am getting stressed out. I still feel sort of happy, just annoyed that I keep procrastinating. I feel lonely. I think I miss holding hands. I miss human contact. I mean, I have regular human contact in my everyday life, but I miss a closer feeling. I really like just sleeping with someone. I don't even think we need to be holding each other; sometimes it is just nice to lay with someone. What am I saying? I'm oddly healthy for the way I treat my body. I really hate it, but I won't lie, it is somewhat of an addiction. I need to get better man, I am sick of this. Baby steps... baby steps. Okay, I am going to start my homework now. I hate when finals start to come up. During summer, I want to get good at the banjo, I want to save money and I want to camp SOMEWHERE. I want to feel fresh and warm breezes on my face. I want to read a few books. I want to not sleep alone at least once. I want picnics. I am grateful for the friends and family I have.
1 comment:
laying down next to someone is a good feeling. and i dont think much is wrong with you, we all stay up all nght for no reason, it's part of being young.
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